i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize