i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
