Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
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