I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize
