Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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