her vagine was all disorganized.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
