this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Randomize
