just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Randomize
