last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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