hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
Randomize
