I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Randomize
