I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
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