Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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