did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
Randomize