really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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