Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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