Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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