Jerry, you need to find god
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
