DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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