please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Randomize
