How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
