So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
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