I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
