I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize
