Someone shit on the floor
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
