the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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