so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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