Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Randomize
