ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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