This girl is more easily done than said...
why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
you never un-have a 4some
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
I'm bleeding and have questions
Randomize
