stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
