Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Randomize
