...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Just fell off a train. Bad.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize
