The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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