What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
