She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Randomize
