I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
