THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
