Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
