Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
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