me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Randomize
