im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Randomize
