does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
