why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Randomize
