Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Randomize
