Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
