the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Randomize
