he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
