It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize
