sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
We're too hungover to prance.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Randomize
